Its like a cut thats trying to heal that you keep squeezing lemon juice into and cutting over and over again and dont let it heal

"im so depressed. i keep hurting myself and i dont know what to do. i dont want to be depressed and i dont want to hurt myself, its also a sin for me personally in my own beliefs.

its impulse, i cant help it. im so depressed and i think i know why, im trying to think but when im in emotional pains i cant think at all, my ability to concentrate on simple things or think simple things goes down the drain. i get sometimes sort of like an alzheimers patient. its kind of funny. i walked into a donut store that sells donuts and bagel sandwiches. i asked the man at the counter if he could toast the frosted donut with sprinkles and put cream cheese in the middle, the guy said "you mean you want a bagel" and i said yea and got embarrased. i meant bagel but i said donut with sprinkles instead
awfully embarrasing i loser my concentration and some ability to think when im worried or over stressed and depressed. i am young too and in my 20s. so its not normal
i know its from stress because this only started happening when the stress and stressful things in my life got over the top and out of hand. one days when im not stressed my thinking and concentration is better

i am very depressed and i think i know why

because my sister torments me to no end. i honestly think something is wrong with her like shes posessed by real demons. like the bad kind that do evil and cause terror on the world. again those are my religous beliefs for beliving in such things. some people do not believe in such things.
she torments me excessively that i dont know what to do, i live with my parents and she lives with us and shes 19. every day she in single minded and she makes it a point to torment me. she makes it her job to terrorize me and make me uncomfortable and make sure i never get anything done for myself. she looks for me when she wakes up and when she finds me she screams and curses at me and puts me down and says terrible things to me, she tries to get violent and swings objects at my and kicks me. she acts bored and has nothing better to do with her time. every time she around me its about saying the worst and most hateful things to me, scary things to me and being violent and hitting me as much as she can

its like a job for her like she must do this to me or else, its like a game she has where she counts how many times she can swing her arms at me, spit at me, kick me, push me and hit me with objects and how many times she can curse me and make harrassing and scary remarks to me. its horrible its been almost 2 years since ive been able to have a normal conversation with her. every time she talks to me the entire conversation on her part is about putting me down and hitting me where it hurts and discouraging me and being violent, she says scary things and she tells me she has powers over me and knows my future and all my secrets, she has come up to me and told me details of things i dreamed of or nightmares in my sleep., she predicts things that eventually happen. she predicted people i know dying,she predicted tradgedy and people getting sick. its scary and her new abilities are probably related to why she beats me or acts rude and sick towards me. they are connected because they both happen at once

i was also attacked by a ghost in my home while she was standing in the same room and coming after me violently, shye was cursing at me and i said you cannot hit me anymore, i stood up for myself and she stared at me in the worst way with eyes so scary and all of a sudden something stronger then me pushed me to the ground. i was knocked down by something that was not there. my sister couldnt have done it because she was like 7 feet away from me. no one shoves themselves down like that., i felt a force. and she saw the whole thing happen and she smirked about what happened and did not ask what happened as if she knew.

something is odd going on, i have paranormal acitivity in my home.

its much easier for me to concentrate and not feel depressed when there is peace around me and no one is abusing me. but she abuses me every day and screams at me and curses at me and makes threats, she tells me to die and eggs me on to commit suicide. im terrified of her. her voice is really strange too. she does odd sounds with her mouth and other family members notice it too but they dont want to do anything.

i cant stand the abuse and i cant leave anywhere, i have a physical disability and trouble walking so i cant get a job. im trying to recover from physical injuries and my father has adult guardianship over me and he dosnt want me to do anything good with my life so he wont let me move away. he keeps threatening me with court cases. i need to get the adult guardianship ended so that i can go away from him and stop this abuse

my father is abusive too, the both of them togeather

i have no one, im stressed my sister dosnt let anyone from the rest of my family talk to me. i have no one and no friends, im in pain pjhysically and emotionally. i cant do anything. i hate being home becase all i hear are my family ganging up on me and putting me down 24 hours a day. no one likes peace in my family. everyone always fights or does things that are mean

whatever is going on in my life is the perfect c9ocktail for making a person depressed and self injure.. constant abuse from family, being isolated and having no one, having your life taken over and being controlled in bad abusive and in unhealthy ways. i cant stand it. what is wrong with my crazy family? they lost their marbles... they are all pretty crazy right now and they disrespect me severely , its not normal.

what is going on? maybe thertes some paranormal thing taking over my family and making them treat me like garbage and abuse me to a point i want to harm my self. its so bad. how does one deal with emotional pain.

the pain never goes away becase my sister hurts me every day over and over again no matter how much i try to heal she hurts me the next day over again. its like a cut thats trying to heal that you keep squeezing lemon juice into and cutting over and over again and dont let it heal. thats really bad.

why is there no peace in my home, why is there no love or kindness, everyone is walking around misearable and angry at me and mean
they all have this big very paranoid prejudice against me.

its everyone in my family. they all gang up on me like im some stranger who did something terrible. but i did nothign wrong and they know i did nothing wrong. my sister gets my other sister riled up against me and visa versa.

what can i do, i see a never ending cycle of being controlled by these freaks

she ruined my summer also and sat to watch me and blocked me from doing anything. she sat in the home and didnt let me go out, she screamed at me and tried to stop me from eating and she got violent.

she acts like a rabid animal at times, and viscous and reckless


becase of the wrongful adult guardianship i cant leave her and im not mentally disabled so i dont need adult guardianship, id be fine on my own with no one in charge of me"

Source: http://www.recoveryourlife.com/forum/showthread.php?t=113946