No one gives a shit about me

"I dunno wha5t the fucks, wrong wth me. I feel like sht alk the GOd-damn time, and want to kill myself for about half that, hut I don't go through with it. WHy the hell am I still here? I have no reason to fucking get up every morniung, no motivqtion to do anything, and yet I still do it. I hate my life more than I ever have before, adn yet I keep going. What the fuck is thta all about? I wish it would all just end, and all the damn sadness would stop, but who the hell am I kidding? I'm doomwd, end up story. Nothing good wil fucking happen, I'm juat going to be miserable. No one gives a shit about me. I;ve aleady fucked things up wth Hayley, now Nikole doesn't give a dman. SHit, I've got nothing left. Welll, fiuckk my life. Seriously. I have nothing to fucking live for, but I don't have the damn balls to end it. I don;t even know what I want to do with my life. Yes, I want to bring scum to justince. but whta's the fucking differmence, reqlly? I hate myself, yet I presume to think I'm good enough to lockn other people up? What the fukcm is that? If there was a God, he'd strike me dead right now, and end it. Fuck living, hpnstly,. Damn it all, I hate thi,s shit. No one fucking cares anymore. Imcan;t even talk to anyone at scool. I'm such a damn coward. Maybe that's why I hold on ao tightly to things that are clearly destined to fail; Im deserate for love, or fondness of some kind. Shit . ; . Why am I still alive? Fucking shit . . . GOd, ig you're there, just kill me. Please, just let me go to sleep, qnd never wake up. I'M SO SICK OG ALL THIS SHIIT. EVry day is exct;y the same. Wake up, eat, hate life, eat more, want to die, eat spome fucking more, sleep, rpeat. Kill. Me. Now.

Anx no one cares. Hayley doesn't csre anymore (fpr gopd reason), Nikole doesn;t care anymor,e Cheyanne doesn;t care anymore,ad nauseum. So, again, why the fuck am I here? No one gives a shit, might as well die. Oh, wait. My bad. I don;t habe then fucking gutsk, due tp the off-chance thaty someone miught actually care, and theroefore I'd be hurting them. What the fuyck??

I cn;t even fucking ealk. Seraiously. Imjust had some more booze, and i barely made it back. What the fuck? God dman, I d=ate mysef. I fuckd up everyt good relatiomship (pr chance, at a relationship, for thatmatter) I'be eer had. So why nit just end it? It' not as thougnthngs are giiung to get nay better,s hit. I fukced, emd pf story. Noth8mg will impove, and ecerything will stay the fuycking dsme. I. Am. Fukced. End of Goid-damn sotry. What the shit. Thre;'sa damn .22 pistol dowstrairs, why don't I use it? Inguess it it's because of the Catholic radition I was brought up in, If you vommmit suiice,===, yoiu go to Hell, end of story. But, qhTWS= the fuck? I;m n athe9ist, damn it. Too mnay unANSWERED pratyers/ Wjo care about hell? Ot's not real, afyer all. Shiiit. PleSSE, God, though I be an athesist, end ot. Lease, free me fro the life O'm living, I want tindie. IHATE THE WABTHIS SHIT IS GOING FOR ME,. Everythign sucks. No one gives a shit. Please, kill me. Let me have a heartbattavck. TrDE MY life for somone more deservijg ovf it/ I Hte life, sm0one else might want kore of it. SWAPM THEIR PLAICE with mijen pleaae. Let tem live, insteqad iof me.I have nothing to fucking live for. Let those who enjoy life live in my place. As i;ve said, I haeve noting to live for/ No one gives a shitl 'nuff said. I don;t wnt to live, so why continue on? It;s a waste of time. SO many p3opl3 wih they had mroe time to spend on thid Earth, but Inwish ny time was up/ Shit, fuck it. Let someone else take my pkace. Plaese. So many othern [eople could make the best of what htey have, but not me. Fuck me. I'm wrthless. shoiit. I',M SUCH AM awful fuckin person. BEing e,otiojally needu,Y AND SHIt. DAMN IT, I' uzing way tooo much prfofajity for me to pass this off as my normal self, PleAE, GOD, DON;T ;ET ME WAKE UP/ I wanf this suffering toend.' I pend a;lmost every minut3e of everybday regretting all th dhit I' vd done. I;ve fcuked up so bad. Damn it, God, what the fukc is wrong eith me? And why am I ask8ng you, if I;m an atheist? Shiit. Pleasem, =strike me down. I want this t0 end. I'm tirednof living, Its just a constant cycle og getting fuckd over repeatedly.n Damn, man. y lfe is so fucked. No friends, no people Ic an trust, etc. I screwedm, in a pbulosp0hical sense. I dunno whta the fcuck I'm talking abou. Ju
Just let me die, pleSE. Just let it all end, for good. Why am I sitll here? What is my purpose? A source of amusement, perhaps? I'me] sared to drnk anymore, frsnkl;y. Shit, I might emd up likr J.P. fro work, funning sround the main ,obby, clwppijg my fsmn hands and shiotu==== , WHAT HAPPENED WITH HAYKEY, ANYWAHYY> DAMN, SH E MADE everything perfect. END IF STORY, No guilt, no buthh=urt, nithhing. Perfecgion. Shiiit: Well, fuck what"m saying, given tbe timr. I TRYM=, BUTNYOUNKNOW. ANYWHO, PKEASE, GO, STRIKE ME DEAD.\?"

Source: http://crymyveinsout.blogspot.com/