No one listens to me

"I feel silly when I'm myself. i act like a child and i often miss communicate with people. i end up alone because none wants anything to do with me cause I'm weird and to much trouble because of my "problems" .and no one listens to me, they treat me like I'm not even in the room and don't even pay attention to me when i ask a question. and when they ask me a question they dont listen to my answer because my answer are so long and weird.

But when I'm myself i go off into my head and i find true happiness and joy. i create great works of art from singing to drawing to writing books.

I am happy and feel alive. and I'm not as depressed and not as nervous.

But when i act "normal" i am popular but i don't like the people i'm around. i get drained from trying to pay attention to all the subtle social cues. I get depressed cause im not doing what i want and it makes me unhappy.

People listen to me, infact the whole room stops talking to listen to me. but its not the real me its all an act. and i don't want to act. i want to be myself.

What i want to know is it ok to be me.

I am uncertain about my future and may be motherless homeless and i feel i have to find work soon to keep my world from falling apart. but im not ready yet. so i know i will probably be on the street and alone.

My mother is ill and possibly has cancer. we may lose our home and i don't know what to do.

I worry if I'm myself ill end up alone. but everyone else gets to be themselves why cant i?

I dont know if thispost makes any sence but hopefully you all can give me some good advice. you always do.

Thanks WP your all my friends in my eyes."

Source: http://www.wrongplanet.net/postt112097.html