Freak Of Nature

"I'm so down on myself most of the time. I feel as if there's nothing in this universe that can make me better. I wish I was normal. I wish I could be as happy as some people out there are. But everytime I look into the mirror I see a 'Freak Of Nature'. It's like having a second arm or something. Everytime I walk down the street people are staring at me. I didn't ask to be born this way. Yet, I live through life enduring it's effects. I didn't ask to be ridiculed and insulted through-out my lifetime of living. All I ever wanted was a girfriend. Even a friend of the opposite sex to talk to. I know it may sound selfish of me to ask that but I have enough male friends who really doesn't do much for my mood. I know I need a special girl, a best friend who would listen to the stuff I had to talk about.

I know what most would think. He's just after sex. To be honest, I've already had sex, it was. . .sex. But it wasn't what I needed. I need someone to have a heart to heart with. I know it's basically pointless to rant about it here, but if I keep this bottled up then I'm really going to implode. I lost the only girl who ever "cared" about me. She didn't want to be near me anymore. As much as it pains me, I couldn't blame her for her decision. I practically gave verything I had just for her. When she made a stupid decision that resulted in my car getting stolen, I forgave her and never used it in an argument.

. . .lol, Is it really pointless to expose my feelings here? Because most likely all anyone can offer me is advise that I've already tried and failed at. My heart husts so much. . ."

Source: http://www.teenhut.net/depression-self-harm-suicide/88351-freak-nature.html